Everybody Loves Raymond - Working Girl   View more episodes

Aired at 03:00 PM on Friday, Jun 11, 2010 (6/11/2010)      View all transcripts from this day


00:00:04Listen, why don't I show you her campaign on our pizza account?
00:00:19Uh, she created a character that was supposed to go on all their packaging and ads.
00:00:27The man who invented pizza.
00:00:31Professor pete za.
00:00:42 it is cute, but, you know, our clients aren't paying us for cute.
00:00:45They don't want a guy with a pun name and a mozzarella hat.
00:00:50Ok. but, I mean, this is just one thing.
00:00:53You fired her for one thing?
00:00:54I really didn't want to fire debra, but she just wouldn't let go of it.
00:00:59I mean, I told her, I said, "i don't really think that this is what the clients want," now, I really hate to say this, but I think she's a little stubborn.
00:01:12 that doesn't sound like my debra, though.
00:01:17She was probably nervous, you know, ..
00:01:23Do you think you could give her another shot?
00:01:25No. I'm sorry. I really can't.
00:01:29It was really nice meeting you.
00:01:31All right. ok. I'll get out of your way.
00:01:32I'm sorry.
00:01:36I'm just sorry that you didn't get to see debra at her best.
00:01:39You know, it's just hard for her to be at her best all the time because she's got so much to put up with.
00:01:46You know, there's me.
00:01:48I'm a much bigger problem than I look.
00:01:51And then, I don't know if she told you this, but my parents live right across the street.
00:01:56Yeah. that's right.
00:02:02Coming over every day, for the rest of your life.
00:02:03And she's already-- she's juggling the kids and the school and the gymnastics and--yeah.
00:02:10All right. well, anyway, I'm sorry.
00:02:12You know what? you can refile that. ha!
00:02:16Gosh, I had no idea.
00:02:18How many kids do you have?
00:02:32Hey, puka shell.
00:02:35Hi. hi.
00:02:39A gift for my wife.
00:02:41Oh. great.
00:02:42I could use it to carry juice boxes to gymboree.
00:02:47Or to the charlotte sterling agency if you like your juice with lunch.
00:02:53You got your job back. ta-da!
00:03:00I talked to charlotte.
00:03:01She's going to give you another shot.
00:03:03Charlotte? when did you talk to charlotte?
00:03:05Today. today. I skipped lunch.
00:03:08How could you do that?
00:03:10I had a big breakfast.
00:03:14Oh, my god. oh, my god.
00:03:17Who do you think you are? how dare you?
00:03:21What do you mean? I'm being supportive.
00:03:23But you groveled for my job?
00:03:28Charlotte's a very reasonable person.
00:03:30I just--i told her that, you know, pete za was-- she told you about pete za?
00:03:36Professor pete za.
00:03:43What were you thinking?
00:03:44Oh, it was good! I thought it was good.
00:03:48But his hair was cheese.
00:03:49That was his hat, ray, all right?
00:03:51I was trying to reach a wide demographic.
00:03:53It was for teens and adults and-- you know what? you wouldn't understand.
00:03:56See, now, that's the kind of attitude that might get people fired.
00:04:02Hey, i-- i-- I thought it was funny.
00:04:17Ally liked it!
00:04:18Oh, honey.
00:04:21Ally's 6.
00:04:23I know, but she's the only one I have to run things by.
00:04:28I'm here.
00:04:33You know what you should try tomorrow?
00:04:37Lynn guine. ha!
00:04:41Lynn guine.
00:04:46That'd be funny.
00:04:49You know, like, spaghetti hair ..
00:05:04Come on. look.
00:05:06I can't go back there. it's too humiliating.
00:05:09I mean, I just-- oh, god, I don't know what happened to me.
00:05:12The whole time I was arguing with charlotte, I was thinking, "come on. what are you doing?
00:05:15" but I just had to keep fighting for pete za.
00:05:23Look, you know, I know why you fight.
00:05:26It's because you're surrounded by barones.
00:05:28 it's survival of the fittest.
00:05:32If you didn't learn how to hold your own, my mother would be wearing you as a coat.
00:05:36Look, I'm not going to blame your family for me losing my job.
00:05:41Why not?
00:05:41Because that's a big cop-out.
00:05:42I'm doing it when I get fired from my job.
00:05:47Look, it was nice, you know, .. tried to do.
00:05:59[Dooopens] I brought you comfort food.
00:06:07You're welcome.
00:06:12Oh, I'm sorry you got fired.
00:06:15But, you know, it's probably for the best.
00:06:18If you want to expand your horizons, how about taking up gardening?
00:06:23I mean, your yard could use a lot of work.
00:06:28Yeah. hey, gardening is fun.
00:06:32You--you have lost weight. you look good.
00:06:33You look good.
00:06:36Mother, she looks good?
00:06:37Yeah. you're looking slim.
00:07:42sentidentical identical gifts, at identical prices, from veryunidentical stores.
00:07:46Let's see what happens.
00:07:48EMPLOYEE: All ready to go.
00:07:49HUSBAND #1: Thank you.
00:07:54WIFE #2: Electronics?
00:07:55COMPETITOR EMPLOYEE: That way.
00:07:56WIFE #2: Happy Father's Day!
00:07:58HUSBAND #2: I got this...
00:08:01WIFE #2: Let's go to yourbrother's house.
00:08:02HUSBAND #2: But I can do this!
00:08:03WIFE #2: Let's go!
00:08:03HUSBAND #1: Watch and learn.
00:08:04VO: With delivery and hook-upincluded on all LG Internet connectable TV's, Dad's happy and you're happy.
00:09:43Yes, we do have an opening, and I'm sure that you're a really fast learner, but i--i really need someone with more p.r.
00:09:54You don't understand.
00:09:55I have to get out of the house.
00:09:58My husband drives me crazy.
00:10:01Ok. uh, thank you for your interest.
00:10:04Before you make any final decisions, why don't you taste this lasagna?
00:10:11Right now?
00:10:12Oh, please, dear.
00:10:14You're so thin.
00:10:18Captioning made possible bytalk productions Captioned by CAPTIONEERING Your Closed Captioning Resource Monica: Come in.
00:10:38I've been waiting for you.
00:10:45(screams) My god!
00:10:47Oh, my god, monica!
00:10:49Oh, my god.
00:10:50I'm sorry. sorry.
00:10:53I was taking a nap.
00:10:54Since when do you take naps in that position?
00:10:58God, monica, say you were waiting for a guy.
00:11:00Please say you were waiting for a guy.
00:11:02Yes. yes, I was.
00:11:04A guy.
00:11:05From work.
00:11:07I'm seeing a guy from work!
00:11:10Oh, that cute waiter guy from your restaurant.
00:11:12The one that looks like a nonthreatening ray liotta?
00:11:16Uh-huh! that one.
00:11:18You know what?
00:11:18Just give me a second, I'll be out of your ha I'm just going to grab a jacket.
00:11:22When I get back, I want every little detail.
00:11:28(knocking) Maybe that's him.
00:11:35It's just joey and ross.
00:11:37Why aren't you guys at the movie?
00:11:39We were, but ross was talking so loud on his phone they threw us out.
00:11:42I had to talk loud because the movie was loud.
00:11:47He's talking to london.
00:11:49Oh, my god!
00:11:50Did he get in touch with emily?
00:11:51Well, no. not yet.
00:11:52He's calling everyone on her side of the family hoping someone will help him get in touch with her.
00:11:57I don't care if I said some other girl's name you prissy old twit!
00:12:02Hey, ross.
00:12:04Way to suck up to the family.
00:12:06(chuckling) .. ah...
00:12:12I'm so glad you guys are all here.
00:12:15My office finally got wrinkle-free fax paper!
00:12:20[Captioning sponsored byWARNER BROS. TELEVISION] ♪♪ When the rain starts to fall ♪♪
00:12:26♪♪ I'll be there for you ♪♪
00:12:28♪♪ Like I been there before ♪♪
00:12:31♪♪ I'll be there for you ♪♪
00:12:34♪♪ 'Cause you're therefor me, too. ♪♪
00:14:43No, no, no.hey.
00:14:45Vomit tux.no, no. vomit tux.
00:14:48Don't worry.i had it dry-cleaned.
00:14:50Vomit tux?
00:14:53You know what?
00:14:55What you up to, joe?
00:14:57Well, they're doingthis telethon thing on tv and my agentgot me a job as co-host.
00:15:02Oh, that's great!
00:15:04A little good deed for pbs,plus some tv exposure.
00:15:08Now, that's the kind of mathjoeylikesto do.
00:15:12Yuck! pbs.
00:15:14What's wrong with pbs?
00:15:16What'srightwith them?
00:15:18Why don't you like pbs, pheebs?
00:15:20Okay, 'cause right aftermy mom killed herself I was just in this really badplace, you know, personally.
00:15:27I just thought thatit would make me feel better if I wrote tosesame street 'cause they were so nicewhen I was a little kid.
00:15:34No one ever wrote back.
00:15:35Well, you know a lot of thosemuppets don't have thumbs.
00:15:38All I got was a lousy key chain and by that time,i was living in a box.
00:15:44I didn't have keys.
00:15:46I'm sorry, pheebs.
00:15:47I just, you know ..
00:15:50Like you didwith the babies.
00:15:52This isn't a good deed.
00:15:53You just want to get on tv.
00:15:55This is totally selfish.
00:15:56Whoa, whoa, whoa!
00:15:57What about you having those babies for your brother?
00:16:00Talk about selfish.
00:16:02.. what are you talking about?
00:16:05It was a really nice thing and all but it made you feel really good, right?
00:16:09Yeah. so?
00:16:10Well, it made you feel good, so that makes it selfish.
00:16:13Look, there's nounselfish good deeds. sorry.
00:16:17Yes, there are.
00:16:17There are totally good deeds that are selfless.
00:16:20Well, may I ask for one example?
00:16:22.. you know... there's...
00:16:25No, you may not.
00:16:27Sorry to burst that bubble, pheebs but selfless good deeds don't exist, okay?
00:16:31And you know the deal on santa claus, right?
00:16:34I'm going to find a selfless good deed.
00:16:37I'm going to beat you, yoil genius.
00:16:40(phone rings) Hello?
00:16:44Hello, ross?
00:16:45.. oh, my god!
00:16:47Oh, my god, it's emily!
00:16:48It's emily, everyone!
00:16:50Shh! shh!
00:16:54Ross, I'm only ringing to say stop harassing my relatives. good-bye.
00:16:57No. wait, wait. look. okay, okay.
00:16:59You can hang up, but I'm going to keep calling.
00:17:01I'm going to call everyone in england if that's what it takes to get you to talk to me.
00:17:05Really? about what?
00:17:07Look, you're my wife.
00:17:08.. we're married, you know.
00:17:10.. I love you. i...
00:17:12I really miss you.
00:17:15I miss you, too.
00:17:17Well, at least I think I do.
00:17:19She's talking.
00:17:20All (whispering): Yay!
00:17:25Hey, joey, when ..
00:17:29That he doesn't exist.
00:17:36So, chandler, have you heard about monica's secret boyfriend?
00:17:40.. yeah. she, uh...
00:17:41.. she might have mentioned him.
00:17:44So, mon when are we going to meet this new secret waiter man?
00:17:49Oh, he's really shy.
00:17:50I don't think he's up to meeting everyone yet.
00:17:52Yeah, I don't think he's up to meeting everyone yet.
00:17:55I don't care.
00:17:56I want to meet this guy who's the best sex she ever had.
00:18:03That's what you heard?
00:18:04You said that?
00:18:06I might have said that.
00:18:07(laughing) Why is that funny?
00:18:12Because I'm very happy for him.
00:18:15Andyou,you lucky dog.
00:18:21Hey. hi.
00:18:21Well, emily's willing to work on the relationship.
00:18:24That's great!
00:18:26In london.
00:18:28She wants me to move to london.
00:18:30But you live here.
00:18:34You know that.
00:18:36.. what... what are you going to do?
00:18:38I bet if I talked to carol and susan I could convince them to move to londonwithben.
00:18:45 I'm sure your ex-wife would be more than happy to move to another country so you can patch things up with yournewwife.
00:18:53It could happen.
00:19:01This will be your phone.
00:19:08I'm not really expecting a lot of calls.
00:19:11No, you answer it and take pledges.
00:19:14But I'm the host.
00:19:15No, gary collins is the host.
00:19:17You'll be answering the phone.
00:19:19You don't seem to understand.
00:19:21See, I was dr. drake ramoray.
00:19:24Well, here's your phone, doctor.
00:19:29I cannot believe I can't find a selfless good deed.
00:19:31You know that really old guy that lives next door to me?
00:19:34Well, I snuck over there and raked up all the leaves on his front stoop, but he caught me and force-fed me cider and cookies.
00:19:43Then I felt wonderful.
00:19:45That old jackass.
00:19:47You know, maybe joey's right.
00:19:48Maybe all good deeds are selfish.
00:19:50I will find a selfless good deed because I just gave birth to three children and I will not let them be raised in a world where joey is right.
00:19:59Hey, monica?
00:20:00Can I ask you a cooking question?
00:20:03If you're cooking on the stove does that mean that your new secret boyfriend is better in bed than richard?
00:20:13Is he?
00:20:16Look, you know what?
00:20:17I think I'm going to respect the privacy of my new secret boyfriend.
00:20:24I mean if this guy wasme and it wasmewho would learn that it wasmethat was the best you'd ever had I'd be going like this.
00:20:41Ross: All right, emily as much as I love you I'm sorry, I can't move to london without ben.
00:20:47I understand that would be difficult.
00:20:50Would you please consider moving here?
00:20:52I mean, you were going to move here anyway.
00:20:54Why can't you just do that?
00:20:59O-okay, okay, but I know that even though I've been a complete idiot up till now y-you have to come here.
00:21:07You have to, so we can work this out together.
00:21:12All right.
00:21:13A-all right?
00:21:14Did you just say all right?
00:21:15I did. now I'm the idiot.
00:21:18Oh, emily, that is so great!
00:21:20It's going to be so great!
00:21:21We're going to be like, like two idiots in love!
00:21:26(chuckles) Ross, there's one thing that really scares me still.
00:21:32Yes, tell me.
00:21:33You have to understand How humiliating it was for me up on that altar in front of my entire family, all my friends.
00:21:39.. I am so sorry.
00:21:42And then, after deciding to forgive you seeing you at the airport, catchingourplane withher.
00:21:50Again, very sorry.
00:21:54I mean, I can't be in the same room with her.
00:21:57It drives me mad just thinking of you being in the same room as her.
00:22:01Emily, there is nothing between rachel and me.
00:22:06Okay? I loveyou.
00:22:10All right.
00:22:11I'll come to new york, and we'll try to make this work.
00:22:17As long as you don't see rachel anymore.
00:22:28Is this value meal deluxe?
00:22:30No, no.
00:22:31Deluxe needs a special ingredient!
00:22:33Now it's deluxe!
00:22:35[Tweeeet] whoo!
00:22:39Some places don't add much to value meals.
00:22:41But wendy's deluxe value meals ..
00:22:46With applewood smoked bacon and barbeque sauce.
00:22:48With fries and a drink, only $2.99.
00:22:50♪♪ You know when it's real ♪♪
00:22:51treat yourself to a cool, creamy wendy's frosty today.
00:22:55Just 99 cents.
00:25:39...So I asked emily if she would come to new york and she said yes.
00:25:45No, no, no.
00:25:45Only if I promised never to see rachel again.
00:25:55I mean, how the hell am I supposed to make this kind of a decision?
00:25:59I'm actually asking you.
00:26:02Well, you can't just not see rachel anymore.
00:26:04She's one of your best friends.
00:26:06Yeah, but he cannot not see emily. that's his wife.
00:26:09Yeah. right on. that's true.
00:26:11Yeah, but you've known rachel since high school and you cannot just cut her out of your life.
00:26:17No, you cannot. that's true.
00:26:19Thanks for the help.
00:26:20Problem solved.
00:26:23(phone ringing) Hello.
00:26:27Hey, m Oh, hey, Joe.
00:26:29When are you going to be on tv?
00:26:31See, there was kind of a mix-up in my agent's office but I'm still on tv and that's good exposure.
00:26:38Monica: You're not on tv.
00:26:40Uh, okay.
00:26:41.. how about now?
00:26:47Yeah! there he is!
00:26:49Hello, New York!
00:26:54Hi, chandler.
00:26:57I need that broiling pan joey borrowed the other day.
00:27:00Oh, that was yours?
00:27:02Yeah, we used it when the duck was throwing up caterpillars.
00:27:06Williams-sonoma, fall catalog, page 27.
00:27:09Expect it in four to six weeks.
00:27:12Um, hey, uh, joey's going to be at the telethon for the rest of the day, ..
00:27:16We have the whole place to ourselves.
00:27:19Yeah? so?
00:27:20Well, I just thought maybe you'd want to book some time with the best you've ever had.
00:27:26You know what, champ?
00:27:28I think I'll pass.